I remember the casting call to Forrest Gump. I was more than excited knowing how smart of a person I was and knowing that I could act as a person with a less-than-average I.Q. with my knowledge capacity. It was a no brainer.
I scrambled through the script I had remembered somewhat to find that hidden scene. I was only at the audition for one part so it was very possible that I could have overlooked a couple pages here or there (that's the length of a scene by the way). There was nothing. I looked up and everyone was laughing again. They were laughing at me, because I misplaced that part of the movie. I was going to look like a complete fool, but I couldn't let that happen.
I knew I only had an hour left for the audition, so a 20 minute drive home and 20 minute drive back wouldn't hurt as long as I found my misplaced piece of script.
I broke my door down after making perfect time home. The only problem was, I couldn't find the misplaced script. I cursed, ripped shit apart for 10 minutes and then again for another 15 minutes until I realized one extremely, heart-wrenching terrible flaw that I had.
I thought back at the audition, the guy telling me about the hidden scene, the people laughing immediately afterwards. It was all evidence that everyone was afraid that I would wreck them in the auditions if they let me share their script. It was also this time that I realized that I had only had a half-bottle of Jack Daniels left for my ride back to the audition for one more last minute shot.
I got hungry so I stopped for a quick Drive-Thru meal at McDonald's. I still love their nuggets today, they're so delicious.
I got to my destination and exited the car immediately after I parked it. I took one more swig of Jack and threw the bottle back into the front seat. It was really the only logical reason to keep my composure at the time.
The doors were locked but I didn't mind. When I got into the room that I was waiting in earlier, the same people were there and they were still laughing. "How's that hidden scene coming?", they ask in sync. I told them, "I'm a new man, I'm ready for this audition." In retrospect, I would've said something different at that moment. I certainly couldn't show them up with that statement. I threw up. They stopped laughing. I looked them all in the eye. I threw up again and looked at my vomit. It was a plethora of blood, semen, intestines and a number of other things I couldn't describe. Not only was I sick, but I felt sick just looking at what came out of me. Then I looked back at the people.
I don't remember anything else from that day. My last memory was waking up in my parents' house again and them telling me that I should end my acting career. "My audition, it wasn't good?", I asked them. "No.", they replied. "Not at all". If it just weren't for those big shot Hollywood directors and writers back then, maybe I wouldn't be some piece of shit blogger for NEPA.
By: Chase McDougalberg