Salvo's posts usually start by saying things like, "I'm going to try to make this short", or, "I'm not the type to make a long post but". The most common intro, though, has to be, "Let me be frank". In the end (if you decide to read the entirety of any of her posts) you'll find that you read a plethora of bullshit and hate it so much that you'd rather hear Paul Shaffer talk about his favorite bands of the past 30 years.
Though uninterested about the garbage making your IQ constantly lower into sunken oblivion, you might find a solemnly engaging moment of humility. Some sentences after the paragraph opening, "I am the cheese again", the sentence right before "Kill me please xoxo," states:
"I finally was able to figure out how to make a tripod for my iPhone, check it out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QuSLM92Wh24"
She then ends the Facebook post with at least 30 more uninteresting paragraphs of how men are addicted to hating women, and how her Mother was right the whole time but still won't admit it even though her Mother is probably reading the post on her own Facebook page. Reporting for Beautiful Topics, I'm Chase McDougalburg
By: Chase McDougalberg