By: Peter Gilroy | @NessKids

So tonight was the last night to Fox's hit Sitcom, How I Met Your Mother. The show lasted 9 seasons which is quite impressive considering sitcoms aren't the way they used to be in my time. I Love Lucy and MASH were what I remember the most. Mork and Mindy.

I then thought to myself that I might be getting too old fashioned and that I would give the show a shot and give my two cents on the ending of it. I had asked for Paula to join me but she was too busy counting her cards again. So it was just me, the TV Guide and my old buddy Rockford. Of course, I brought extra treats for him.

Unfortunately, I had fallen asleep after Jeopardy and hadn't woken up until just recently. I figured I'd look online to look at a spoiler to see how the Mother was Met. Turns out there was a Stepmother story of some sort with some other woman that was a part of some other relationship. Just seems like another one of those sitcoms that are on the television today. I guess I'll go on back to bed, Paula will be there and so will the dog.

By: Peter Gilroy

By: Charles McHale | @NessKids

When you're sick of the old fart in your Mother's cereal gag or the kill your little cousins gerbil, try one of these fresh ideas for April Fools.

By: Kimberly Dunn | @NessKids

TGIF! This is your weekend. You can find sex, love, a new job or even a new friend from these fashion tips. The question is, are you ready to "give it all up"? Or are you just not "tough enough"? Some tips for fashion in the 570 for this weekend.

By: Peter Gilroy | @NessKids

I would have my own photograph of my personal collection of fireworks but I don't know how to put my photos into the internet yet, Chuck still has to sit down with me and show me how to do it. The point is clear though. I was looking for something to do after I was to pour myself a bowl of milk with sugar in it and remembered something to do today for entertainment in the ole' 570. Almost one year old fireworks have not only been sitting around in the basement for about a year, but they've been sitting in the back of the corner of my mind for the same amount of years.

By: Chase McDougalberg | @NessKids

Glendive, MT's Lana Salvo has been known to post exponentially, longer Facebook posts day by day which are give or take Facebook-blockish or "unfriendingly" annoying.

Salvo's posts usually start by saying things like, "I'm going to try to make this short", or, "I'm not the type to make a long post but". The most common intro, though, has to be, "Let me be frank". In the end (if you decide to read the entirety of any of her posts) you'll find that you read a plethora of bullshit and hate it so much that you'd rather hear Paul Shaffer talk about his favorite bands of the past 30 years.

Though uninterested about the garbage making your IQ constantly lower into sunken oblivion, you might find a solemnly engaging moment of humility. Some sentences after the paragraph opening, "I am the cheese again", the sentence right before "Kill me please xoxo," states:

"I finally was able to figure out how to make a tripod for my iPhone, check it out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QuSLM92Wh24"

She then ends the Facebook post with at least 30 more uninteresting paragraphs of how men are addicted to hating women, and how her Mother was right the whole time but still won't admit it even though her Mother is probably reading the post on her own Facebook page. Reporting for Beautiful Topics, I'm Chase McDougalburg

By: Chase McDougalberg

By: Chase McDougalberg | @NessKids

Studies have recently proven that Hockey is the only sport that is not played by a juvenile herd of whiny, bitchy, moody, drama queen tissue-carrying bridezilla fucking pussies. The sport is described by skating in an ice rink where large sticks are carried by the skaters and used to constantly hit each other and sometimes a "hockey puck" to hit into a goal on each opposing side of the rink. Considering there is an average of only 2 to 3 goals scored by each side, it's a wonder that the rink isn't completely covered in blood and human remains at the end of the game with the added occasional fist fights that happen within the match.

Other sports such as Soccer, Basketball, and Baseball, however, are only played by pansy-picking coward-ass bitches. With NASCAR racers not able to finish they're laps because of a weak ass broken toe or a Basketball player sitting out because of a broken nose only a little pussy bitch would sit out for, Hockey is hands-down a far tougher sport when a player gets his throat slit by an ice skate and wants to finish a game that he clearly isn't going to win with 3 goals behind and 30 seconds left on the clock.

In a similar study, Football is very neutral but still has some pussy-ass emotional bitches from time to time.

By: Chase McDougalburg

By: Peter Gilroy | @NessKids

Top of the evenin' to ya, eh lads? I ate my Irish soda bread this morn with my Irish green tea. Then for lunch I had a bowl of Irish split pea soup with ham and potatoes for lunch. Guess what I'm having for dinner? That's right, real authentic Irish corned beef and cabbage. What can I do after though? What's in store for me for the rest of the day for entertainment?

There are literally one million things for me to say about the Parade. To be completely honest, there are a million times a googol (that's one with one-hundred zeros in front of it here is the link just click on the entire thing that's in parentheses to see the reason behind the joke) of things for me to say about the parade. In my moment of things to say about the parade, it's unexpected that there will be more than we could ever imagine of people being there, especially in traffic.

By: Charles McHale

By: Kimberly Dunn | @NessKids

I'm looking forward to the St. Patrick's Parade in Scranton as much as the next person, but really, I can't get fully excited until I know exactly what it is that I'm going to wear. Tiffany and I have been studying what other people wear to the parade for almost a year now, and we narrowed down 5 fabulously fashionable styles just for you.

If you're looking for a t-shirt, look no further. There are tons of t-shirts being sold nearby every corner of the parade route in Scranton.

By: Peter Gilroy | @NessKids

Today marks the day to the 5-day countdown to you know what. That's right. St. Patrick's Day. And what better way to spend the day than to search for some four-leaf clovers? With the way the weather season has been, I didn't think it would be possible for me to even find anything green on the back lawn. I know that if I don't find a lucky charm, I can at least grab myself a bouquet of the regular three-leafers (the wife loves them). So my mission for today is, "Where are the Shamrocks!?". Then the rest of the day:

I'll stop at the foot doctor quick since I had an appointment for a while regarding a soon-to-be checkup. Then I'll stop at Gerrity's for a traditional Irish Soda Bread. There's a Blackard behind the counter and I always ask for his best recipe. He'll give me the raisin bread (my favorite soda bread recipe ever) and I'll give props to him sometimes. I can't wait to go to the florist after that usually.

I'll walk through my florist's doors and she'll have the bouquet waiting for me when I show her the three-leafers I have for my darling. The day will end with a nice-iced-lager. And bed.

By: Peter Gilroy